11.03.2009

Broken.

My so-called boyfriend broke up with me. He wants to be friends.

That was his original story.

Real version?

He's fallen for someone else. But he still thinks I'm "an amazing girl". And he wants us to have a second chance. He still has feelings for me. He even said "I love you".

I think it's a load of bull.

I know what he's really thinking. I'm not good enough.

I know I'm not. I'm not thin enough. Or pretty enough. Or talkative enough. And I won't have sex. I also don't live as close as she does to him.

I feel so broken.

Most people will say "get over it" or "its no big deal". But it is.

He was my first boyfriend and he was the reason I was happy for the first time in ten years. He even asked me to marry him.

Now all of that's gone.

I really don't have anything to live for anymore.